Miscommunication occurs frequently with people; especially those who do not want to understand what is being said. Much of the problem is innocent, in the sense that we are all raised differently and may have assigned different meanings to what we think of as common terms. Too many arguments have arisen due to the combination of miscommunication and egos. When our feelings are hurt, it’s wartime for some of us.
So how can we overcome this failure to communicate properly? Honesty helps, but that’s not enough. Sometimes we have to come to define exactly what we mean; that’s where honesty comes in. First we have to be honest with ourselves and admit our true feelings. So we have to be honest with each other and tell the truth, without violence if possible. The only way we can get cooperation without forcing is to speak honestly and be respectful of each other’s feelings and our own.
Putting someone else first and ignoring your own feelings and needs doesn’t work because it only fosters resentment and ‘little red hen syndrome’. When you have to do everything yourself and then everyone who refuses to help wants to share in the harvest, that just doesn’t work. The selfish people of the world need to realize that behavior like that is not allowed now. Astrologers say that Pluto’s influence is bringing the truth to light, uncovering the slime that lurks beneath it all.
Since so many people are trying to get as much as they can from each other, we need to be very clear about the parameters of each deal. So we have to hold the line while they try to manipulate and cross the lines. That saying give an inch and have a mile taken from you applies to these situations. You can usually tell when someone is trying to manipulate previously agreed limits. They get angry when reminded of the limits and demand an explanation of why they can’t do it.
First of all, that’s just rude. Second, they are not owed any explanation. Some of us give them one anyway, for various reasons. Some people just want others to think they are nice. Others simply prefer to avoid hurting someone’s feelings unnecessarily, if possible. Most manipulators will keep making their point thinking they will win by shaming the person whose boundaries they are crossing.
When faced with such an attack, and make no mistake, it’s definitely an attack, start laughing in the manipulator’s face. He points out that they are being extremely rude and that he finds it hysterically amusing that they think they are owed an explanation. Their rude behavior is reason enough to deny them what they want. Then tell them to go away and take all their junk with them, including their nasty negative energies.
Most of us have been raised to be decent and caring people. We are too nice for our own good and the manipulators of the world are more than ready to show us how stupid we are when it comes to taking care of ourselves. Some of us have taken a lifetime to finally understand; others never will in this lifetime. If you are one of those who is easily manipulated, remember this: take care of yourself first. If there is anything left over after your needs are met, you can decide if you want to help someone else. You will live a happy and less resentful life that way.